following the call

For years I have been gently tugged by the heart to move forward, and with purpose.  To care for others, to be present.  To engage in a life of business that helps people at a deep level, teaches people to love themselves and others, and perhaps even helps people believe in something bigger than themselves.

In order to do this, I need to let go of dreams placed on myself by others.  (I suppose I accepted these dreams as reality and as such, it is just as much my fault).  But I haven't done this, and I've continued to stumble about. 

For years I've been running from job to job.  It hasn't been a problem, I'm pretty darn good at an array of things.  And no one seems to care that I haven't held a job longer than a year because heck, I make results happen.  I'm a killer marketer, sales woman, and manager.  As such I've managed brands, launched companies, been the marketing director of a few small businesses that did a few million a year in business, managed a team that was responsible for the largest online marketing account in the world, and much more.

And I have to say it, I'm spent.  Exhausted.  Done-zo.

So I started listening to the tug again, and here I am.  Not sure what it means yet, but I am listening, deeply reflecting, and hoping to build something I am proud of.

Stay tuned.  Big things are afoot.

a shout out :: dr. aviva romm

Just a few weeks ago I stumbled across one of the single greatest resources ever...Dr. Aviva Romm.

Dr. Romm was a home-birth midwife for 25 years, a relatively famous herbalist (she is good buddies with Susun Weed) and now she is a Yale trained and educated MD.  Yup you heard me right, a home-birth midwife went to the MD side, and man is she a wealth of information.

I'd suggest you hop on over, join her mailing list and quickly, and start learning about her secrets to health and wellness.  She is a huge proponent of a truly holistic approach to health–herbal and western–and believes in a mostly veggie diet.

Also if you are in need of a quick snack, she has a recipe for a truly delicious smoothie–her pink prana post-workout glow.   Try it with the cardamom, it is stupid good.  (Photo is from her blog)

thankful, gracious, alive

There isn't enough 'I love you' or enough 'I'm thankful' in my breast today for me to utter, to explicate the thanks and joy I have.  I'm searching for them, hoping to write them out but for all I've been given, there just isn't enough.  But I'll try...

Thank you to each and every one of the souls who've taken care of me, and underwing-ed me here in my new home.

Thank you to everyone who celebrated our marriage with us by giving, loving, helping, hugging...

Thank you to fall for bringing my soul back to my body.

Thank you to my amazing wife who supports me with aplomb, joy, ease, and beauty. 

Thank you to my nearest and dearest friends (you know who you are) for seeing the beautiful mess that I am as being just that...beautiful.

And most importantly (for today)...Thank you for those who have pushed me forward.  Actively.  Who've sung my praises (and given me criticism), who've lived big dreams with me (and been ok when we've failed), and those continue on and realize we've got this.  The world truly is what we make of it.

And continue to make it we shall.

On Mothering :: 'How does that work exactly?'

There are a number of things that are troubling when one is in a domestic relationship that is atypical by American standards.  Yet the single most troubling thing is the amount of personal questions one asks when my wife and I tell our friends (which automatically becomes telling our acquaintances because our crew is like that):  "We are going to start trying to get pregnant soon." 

Now to me this isn't that strange of a statement.  Straight couples say it all the time.  There are never any follow-up questions.  Now I understand that some couples the answers are unnecessary and more times than not it is just the birds and the bees and blammo!  9 months later a beautiful baby is born.

Let's be honest, I don't go around asking near strangers:  'So girl on top?  Boy on top?  IVF? AI?'  Unless they offer that information up to me, I just figure 'ok biological imperative, sperm will meet egg.  the end.'

I get it.  The motor functions and sex cells of a lesbian couples differ, and my wife and I can't simply get pregnant by getting sloppy drunk and pumping our hips for 7 to 10 minutes.  But basic biology still applies.  Sperm must meet egg, become zygote, implant, grow baby.  The how is really not all that important in most cases.  

And I'm not talking about true friends, friends can ask whatever questions they darn well please.  I'm more talking about acquaintances and near strangers.  That is when my fuse truly shortens. 
The most common questions and responses for us are as follows:

"Who is the donor?"
Who cares!  And thanks for reminding us that we are not fully capable of making a child ourselves.  Much appreciated.  We are aware we have a donor, and we do love him dearly.  The details don't really matter, and we'd like to keep the knowledge of that a bit under wraps to people we don't know well, more judging isn't exactly what we are going for. 

"Ummm....how are you going to do it, I just don't get it."
I generally give a response of 'turkey baster' completely in jest, and that always leads to....

"You are really going to just turkey baster that sh*t?"
 No you idiot.  I'm not actually going to use a certified bonafide turkey baster, but explaining the details of a syringe is just awkward at the bar.

"Are you sure this is a good idea?"
Yes.  I am sure.  You told me last week you were trying too.  And never once did anyone say to you such nonsense.  It is not like my wife and I just woke up one day and said 'Holy crap let's start flying across the country regularly to our donor and get preggers' TODAY.  We actually thought through this.  A lot.

"So if you are carrying does that make you the 'girl' in the relationship?"
Last time I checked there was no 'boy' in my relationship, so if that is what you are implying...

Now don't get me wrong, these are few and far between, and more often than not we are hugged and kissed and asked permission before we are asked personal questions.  And that is awesome!  But this is just a cautionary tale.  And I'm working on some good retorts, so be forewarned.

*Note:  Any comments that are negative about lesbian couples raising children, god didn't intend our relationship, etc will be promptly deleted.  Thanks!

Just a little glimpse into the wedding...

Just last weekend we got officially married.   Yeah yeah, I know it said we were already married (we weren't, but I didn't want to update the info three weeks after blog launch).

Here are some photos if you want some insight into our locally sourced, almost 100% handcrafted, cooked by the guests, pie eating affair.  More to come someday.

learning :: the apothecary circle :: (oh hey discount code!)

Being a doula, I am constantly asked 'what herbs should I take for X', and to be honest that is far outside the scope of my practice...Enter the apothecary circle. 

 

Starting on the winter solstice of this year, the lovely Laura Emily over at Good Earth Living is offering an at home study course for all you budding and interested herbalists.  I signed up last week!  And I am so very excited about joining a tribe of over 100 women studying herbalism for 2013.

(Taken from the Apothecary Circle Page)

This yearlong course has one goal- to uncover the healer within you by building your home apothecary, and to gain the knowledge & confidence to use it.


When: December 21st 2012- December 21 2013
Where: Virtual classroom online.
How:
--*Monthly lessons & tutorials on herbs, creating tinctures, salves, lipbalms, capsules, teas, clays, makeup, mist, perfumes, and cooking with herbs.
--*Group community.
--*herbal consultations
--*study of herbs & other holistic approaches.
--*free downloads of over 10 e-books over the course of the year covering topics such as folk recipes, holistic approach to acne and skin problems, managing headaches & migraines naturally, understanding and beating fatigue, general family health, hydration, nutrition, space clearing, crystal therapy, and holistic wellness.
--*six virtual ecourses over the course of the year covering detoxing, cleanses, fasting, space clearing, intentions, and more. Members are required to participate with at least one, but all 6 ecourses/workshops are free and open to members of the Apothecary Circle
--*raw food prep & methods
--*food remedies & nutritional game plans
--*folk remedies
--*space clearing
--*Detoxing to cure & fasting
--*study of essential oils for medicinal properties
--*blueprint for a physical home apothecary
--*Certificate in Home Apothecary.

*While space-clearing, holistic nutrition and detoxing are covered within the monthly lessons, individuals will have the option to earn an emphasis in their certification in either Space Clearing, Holistic Nutrition and Detoxing. Emphasis will be posted to purchase in September. These emphasis studies are not available to those who are not members of the Apothecary Circle.

NOT TO MENTION: 
Those who sign up within September will receive a starter apothecary kit. Five Bulk herbs, 3 earth clay samples, 1 essential oil, 2 oz. of sweet almond oil, 1 oz. organic beeswax, 1 1/2 ounce pre-made tincture, Himalayan Pink Salt, and more. Over $45 worth of materials! All Apothecary Circle members will have free access to all eBooks, eCourses, workshops and lessons throughout 2013. All Apothecary Circle members who participate with one ecouse/workshop, and participate with at least 3 discussion questions will earn a certificate in home apothecary. SEPT sign-ups have the option to get an emphasis studies in ONE of the following- Space Clearing, Holistic Nutrition, and Detoxing without additional fees. You will be contacted in December to see what your emphasis will be. The other emphasis will be available at an additional cost.

All of this is only $99.  Seriously.  

Remember how I mentioned discount code?  If you enter the code HERBS10 at checkout, you'll get 15% off the course.  I get a little love too.  :)

Not for you?  Well, you can use my code to buy anything in the store.  Heck yes!

I'll be blogging about the course once it starts, so come on and join me!

recipe :: paleo-ish granola

I was blessed enough to spend the month of August blogging over at Rhythm of Home, I have cross-posted a few of my pieces over this way but I figured I'd let you know my first recipe is up and ready for viewing.  You should try it!  :)